I had a profile on tinder and badoo for like 2 years. In total I got 0 likes, so theres that. And Im too shy and anti-social to ask a girl on a date in real life.
And if I manage to get a date and we see each other live. My head is empty, I have no idea what to say to them and that will lead to awkward silent moments. And there wont be a second date.
tinder is not the right place for something like that - it's mostly hookups, very much centered on looks and you have to be very, very proactive. (E.g. write an icebreaker-message to every girl you like or you will be completely ignored).
I was on "o.k. Cupid" the last time I really "needed" and it was a lot of tinkering with my profile and trying out what worked and what didn't until it finally worked.
I'm now on o.k. Cupid again, because my gf now wants to be polygamous (women in their midlife crisis 🙄) and I kind of have to look after myself or there will be too much of an imbalance. But I'm not very into it at the moment and it shows. Although women I trust tell me, I'm a 7/10 (I wouldn't say that), I haven't gotten any matches yet. But from past experience I know that's because I'm just there, not experimenting enough with my profile, not swiping right on every woman, not writing blind messages to 50 women a day which might result in 1 date 2 weeks later and not paying for boosts and whatnot. It can be quite frustrating, especially when you know that women just need to be there to get lots of likes and messages. My other ex just had to swipe right and often got a match right away. On the ironic flipside, they usually get the idiots with the inflated ego they are not lokking for.
I can't chat up a woman in a club for the life of me and I don't have a huge self esteem in that regard, but sadly that's what mostly matters. And I know that situation well where your head is empty and everything you say seems just uninteresting. But, you know, it can be the same for women. Nearly every girl I've been with told me that I was a good catch (until I wasn't), but it's not like they are out to catch you. Sadly, emancipation only goes that far.
Really, it's not the looks and not the wit, but it's kind of a computer game. If something doesn't work, don't get frustrated and try harder - or give up - try something different. You're clearly doing something wrong, but it might not be what you think it is. As someone else suggested, therapy - e.g. formulating and speaking thoughts out loud - might help.
I'd bet you that you could easily lose your virginity before you're 40 without paying anybody for it.
